Regret feels bad. But dismissing it entirely, as the popular #noregrets philosophy encourages, may be costing us more than we realize.
On the 250th anniversary of the Declaration of Independence, Laurie Santos takes a closer look at that famous phrase: the pursuit of happiness. With all due respect to the founding fathers, the science suggests that pursuing happiness the way we tend to today can quietly work against us, and the research explaining why is both surprising and liberating.
Key Takeaways:
- The Harder You Chase, the Further It Flees: Research by Iris Mauss finds that the more intensely people strive to be happy, the more likely they are to move away from it, turning a natural human aspiration into a source of chronic dissatisfaction.
- What the Founders Actually Meant: Historian Darrin McMahon reveals that the founders’ understanding of happiness was far richer and more nuanced than the individual feeling-good version we tend to pursue today.
- Monitoring Backfires: Constantly asking “am I happy yet?” puts pressure on the very experience we are trying to cultivate. That self-scrutiny can crowd out the good feelings we are looking for.
- Better Questions Open More Space: Mauss’s research suggests that replacing happiness monitoring with gentler questions like “what went well today?” or “what did I enjoy?” creates room for positive experiences to arise naturally rather than under pressure.
The Happiness Lab explores the latest scientific research and shares surprising and inspiring stories that challenge how we think about happiness. New episodes usually air every Monday.
